Give me the most complex Celtic cross you can carve. Really pull out the stops on this one. Hang the expense. I happen to love its complexity. But there's also something kind of painful about the font. I imagine chiseling it all out of granite and it makes me sigh.
There are graven resumes everywhere. Now, I have held a few jobs for one or two years, but I'm not going to commit them to marble. Wow. Seems to me Mr. Everett bounced around a bit. All right, he bounced in high places. But he still bounced. President of this, professor of that, minister of this, senator of that.
I wish you could hear Kris' helpless laughter as she shows me this one. I know it's hard to read, so here's what it says:
"An eminent American Inventor
whose great mind conceived
ideas and brought into operation
works of art that will live for ages."
Which is not, in itself, that funny until you walk around the stone and see the carved depictions of his works of art.
No explanation needed, apparently; we'll all know what that is. For ages.
And that? Oh, there's one in every...shoe factory? I don't know why this delights me and Kris so, but it does. No disrespect to Thomas Blanchard or his descendants intended, but this monument cracks us up.
As does this one, which I call LEMME OUT TEBBETTS!! I think they're trying to prevent noselessness here, protecting it from acid rain, but it's just sooo creepy to see Mr. Tebbetts fogging up the Plexiglas with his cold breath.
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